September 15, 2009

Sexual Harassment & Blaming the Victim

Reading the comments on this article, I had a hard time controlling my blood pressure. The article discusses sexual harassment against women and how it is still present in Ramadan. First of all, what did ya expect? With all due respect, who doesn't have moral standards for the 11 months of the year isn't going to suddenly develop some, holy month or not. Second of all, the prevailing mentality seems to always blame the women and practically fear them for their "fitnah".

Now I understand that there is such a thing as a provocative outfit that could attract more attention to a female, but any female above the age of 12 who has spent more than one hour walking a street in Jordan will tell you, the demeaning comments will come whether you're wearing a Jilbab, a veil or a a normal jeans and t-shirt. Also, there is something very wrong with a culture that divides women into fully veiled and therefore decent and not veiled or not properly veiled and therefore have no morals.

So it really pisses me off to tell me that it's my fault for being insulted by an asshole with no manners who considers my walking down the street an invitation for him to express his carnal thoughts.

And for the commentators who blame the women, are you comparing yourselves to animals who just can't control themselves at the sight of a woman? By what logic should we lock up the women at home -several comments seemed to suggest that-, if you're the animal that cannot be controlled? I say we should lock YOU up.

I know I'm preaching to the wrong audience here, but sexual harassment is an issue that hits a nerve for each woman. It is an issue that needs to be strictly dealt with, and not by blaming the victim but by punishing the offender. I'm not one to encourage violence, but I think every woman should buy a taser and stun the hell out of any asshole who dares to come near her.

9 comments:

Ali said...

I can't agree with you more farah, I can't imagine myself hitting on a girl while i refuse that 100% for my sister or any relative or even a dear friend.

I have been with so many guys, They all think they're COOL when doing this, The only thing they get out of hitting on girls is curses and rejection from the girl.

Shmal said...

You girls should get pepper spray as well :D. I strongly agree with this as me and a few girls were discussing this exact topic a while back in Irbid, cause sad2eeni there it's a lot worse. They take it to the extent of religion. They used to see my friend wearing a cross and they'd start the comments like the devil was walking amongst them.
Basically, yet another fuck-up of our lofely society.

kinzi said...

Sigh. Dangerous topic for me to get involved in.

This "fully veiled and therefore decent and not veiled or not properly veiled and therefore have no morals" makes me a little crazy.

My morality isn't measured by the amount of fabric on my body.

7aki Fadi said...

I think it's just that they are not civilized I think. I with my own eyes saw a guy pinch a woman wearing a niqab where only her eyes were showing. What more does this lady need to do to stop the harassment?

I once told a guy to eat sh*t when he hit on me and that freaked him out, LOL. because they expect that girls are scared to respond. I felt good after that cos he ran so fast it was funny. But I heard there are even guys who would be worse if you respond.
I hope these people were punished.

bambam said...

2 options:
1) don't say anything and flip them, words will excite them since the voice is a horma i guess or some shit like that but flipping is a gesture that will make them see red (do that only if u carry a bottle of pepper spray)
2) to the assholes (guys) that don't bitch their friends out for doing so I suggest you slip them the number of your favorite B R O T H E L so they would get some release or just bitch them out for being douche-bags

... we are not supposed to curse in ramadan. meh I get pissed when they start legitimizing their harassment. I wonder how a guy will feel if another guy started hitting on him, will that make him realize how it sucks ? |I guess that's option 3

Farah said...

Thanks for the comments, everybody.

Saed said...

I agree so much, it makes my blood boil that our culture just blames everything on everyone else.


"So it really pisses me off to tell me that it's my fault for being insulted by an asshole with no manners who considers my walking down the street an invitation for him to express his carnal thoughts."


I agree so much, I love this post.


It's just really sad, we're a sad pathetic culture who does nothing but look for excuses to do wrong things rather than think and believe in a god. It's a load of shit.


And yes, if you can't control your penis like a fucking dog during the entire year, you definitely won't control yourself for one month.


Great post Farah :)

Farah said...

:)

cairo, lusaka, amsterdam said...

LOVE this post! The same thing happens in Cairo; 9 times out of 10 the girl gets blamed! The first question is always "Well what were you wearing?"